let's get chaotic

Three words: Beck. And. Call. There's no such thing as a "beckon call."  Beck. And. Call.

The usage of Mom, mom, Dad, and dad is getting all crazy on the internets.  Capital-letter Mom or Dad refers to the nickname you call your parent, when you are referring to him or her as that nickname.

"I am going to the store with Mom and Dad."

"Hey, Mom, can you help me with my math homework?"

"I am going to rake leaves with Dad this weekend."

Lower-case mom or dad refers to the noun short for "mother" and "father," respectively.  Used most often with a personal pronoun.

"I saw your mom and dad at the store."

"My dad helped me with my math homework."

"The meeting is only for the moms and dads."

 I am seriously considering reverting from being a Mac to being a PC.

Because here's the deal--while PC software is shitty and easily corruptable, Mac hardware is built on design, not function, breaks easily, and is ridiculously expensive to replace.  I spent $300 earlier this summer refurbishing my iBook, and now the power cord is burned out.  I'm on my third power cord in five years for this laptop.  There was actually a class-action lawsuit about these power cords because they suck so much--one of the three I've gotten was part of the settlement.

I have been told by many people that you can go to the Apple store, tell a sad story, shed some tears if you can, and you are often sent home with a free new whatever--in this case, a new power cord, but I have heard of this happening with everything from mice to iPod Touches.

Now, here's the thing.  That's all well and good when you feel like you've conned your way into a free iPod, but that's not how customer service is supposed to work.  Apple is like one step away from having really good customer service, which is where something broke, it wasn't your fault, we know there's a problem with this particular hardware, so here, take a new one. We're really sorry.  Instead, they have that policy, but you have to embarrass yourself to do it?  Nuh-uh.  I am not going to go down there and cry like a little girl.

I have talking points.

1. The power cord burned out.  This is the third power cord I've had for this laptop--another burned out and the one before that frayed.  I know you know this is a bad design; that's why you totally changed the power cord for the MacBooks.

2. I can't afford to buy a new power cord.

3. With the money I'd have to use to buy a new power cord, I could put that money toward a brand-new HP Netbook, which retails for $279 and runs on Linux.

4. Just saying, I have an HP for work, and even though Apple scared me into thinking it was going to be a piece of shit, it actually runs really, really well.

5. Basically what it boils down to is that if you don't help me out here, I won't be able to use my iBook ever again, which means I'll need a new laptop soon, and I can guarantee you I'll never buy another Apple again.

Anybody got other suggestions?

 I am under the impression that while a from-scratch layer cake or cupcakes are significantly better than storebought or from-a-box, brownies from a box are basically the best they're going to get.

But in the future, I want to learn how to make better brownies, particularly--

Brownies with raspberry filling

Blondies, like the kind you can get at Potbelly (holy God, so delicious)

Peanut butter brownies that don't make you want to throw up because they're so filling

If anybody has good recipes for anything like this, let me know!

 Mondays

How I Met Your Mother, 8:00
Gossip Girl, 9:00
The Big Bang Theory, 9:30

Wednesdays

Glee, 9:00

Thursdays

Flashforward, 8:00
The Office, 9:00
Fringe, 9:00
Grey's, 9:00 (AKA Friday Hulu)
30 Rock, 9:30
Private Practice, 10:00
The Mentalist, 10:00

Dear ABC, please don't even consider putting Lost on Thursday nights. And please put it back in its 10:00 spot so they can show lots of bloody smoke monster maimings and dirty dirty Jex.  Love, me.

 Some of you may have seen the picture I posted on Twitter the other day of the inside of my freezer. At the time, it contained only an entire ice cream cake and a bottle of vodka.

By the way, SAD STORY. I took that mondo bottle of Skyy to a fourth of July party, and right as I was going in, the paper bag in which I was carrying it broke and glass (and, more importantly, vodka) spilled all over the sidewalk.  Major buzzkill.  Luckily the Jack Daniels was in a plastic bottle and survived long enough to be consumed by me in an embarrassing and patriotic debacle of epic proportions.

Anyway.

I am also officially in car-savings mode.  I have plane tickets to go to my parents' for Labor Day weekend.  My dad is going to be the middleman on this deal and find me a car between now and then, which I will then purchase from him.  (Right now, I'm thinking a Hyundai Accent 2-door hatchback.  My dad is thinking a Toyota Corolla.  Something in that vein--cheap and easy to parallel park.)

Anyway, in light of being in car-savings mode, my eating habits needed to change.  Let me tell you, it is really hard to justify the mess of cooking for one.  Also, after you've cooked a whole meal and then consumed it, you really don't want to then have to clean up.  And I don't have a dishwasher, so it's an extra pain.  It's SO EASY to justify takeout.

But do you know how much cheaper it is to eat at home????

Holy crap, Kraft mac and cheese is 74 cents a box.  How is that even possible??  I didn't know there was anything in the entire country that could be purchased for under a dollar anymore.

So I budgeted $50 a week in groceries for the next two months, which should leave me enough money for a vehicle.  I got enough food for two weeks today and I only spent $77.  Pretty good, right?  That means I can go out twice in the next two weeks and still hit my budget.

It also means I have to cook here.  Ughhhh.

 The casting sides for "Harbingers in a Fountain" were released today, and there are a couple of spoilery doozies to be had.

But first, can we just rejoice for a moment at the wonder that is the first day of spoilers? I love it. June sucks for TV fans, as it's pretty much a dead zone for news and material. But July--ah, July! Not only are sides starting to trickle in, but we'll also start getting good scoop from Comic-Con and the TCA tour and the accompanying parties. (TCA time is one of Mae's and my favorite times of the year.) Not to mention Emmy nominations come out very soon, and before you know it, it'll be premiere time, and everything will be back to normal and HOORAY.

Okay, onto the goods.

(clicky clicky clicky analysis)

( that episode should have been called  )

 So you know how Herbal Essences has about a thousand & one varieties?  And each one is a different scent and a different "specialty"?

Well, I have always thought that was just a scam to make you think you need a very specific shampoo.

But, no, it's real.

I usually use the "long-term relationship" variety (shampoo and conditioner for long hair).  But a couple weeks ago, I was drawn to the new moisturizing variety in the pretty pink matte bottles.

AND IT DID HORRIBLE THINGS TO MY HAIR.

Like straw.  It felt digusting even when it was wet.  And it was like no matter what, I couldn't get it to rinse out.  All I could do with it was like messy sex hair, because it was just like a huge gross pile of straw.  And the ends were all gross.  Finally yesterday I was like, fuck it.  I'll spend another $10 and go get my regular stuff, even though this bottle is only, like 1/4 empty.

Well, my tried-and-true long-hair formula worked miracles in one wash.  My hair is soft and shiny and weightless and has lift at the roots and my split ends aren't so splitty anymore.  Oh I'm so happy.

Question: In an episode of Grey's, Meredith says she cuts her own split ends.  Is this really doable?  Because it seems like I could handle that, but if I hear one horror story about that time you tried to cut your own split ends and ended up looking like Kate Gosselin, then I'll never try it.

You know what's ridiculous?

How many damn Post-Its I have.  I have a slight obsession with Post-Its, and so people buy them for me a lot.  I am always excited to get Post-Its, and yet I seem to use them at a much slower rate than I accumulate them.  The result--

 "It was always easy and fun being Amy's mother.  I remember when she was 4 and her preschool had What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up Day. Of the 25 little girls, 24 said, 'Mommy,' and only one said, 'Magician.'  So I knew I had someone special." - Eileen Poehler